Epic Fail vs Nailed It

Tron’s Super Representative Epic Fail — Mike Bloomberg Nailed It

by Paul de Havilland 4 min February 22, 2020
Tron voting Epic Fail - Mike Bloomberg Nailed It in Crypto
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An Epic Fairy-Fail in the Kingdom of Tron

Once upon a time, the Kingdom of Tron was a happy place. It was a peaceful place.

People in the Kingdom of Tron were deeply religious and worshiped the Sun God, by whom all things were created.

And the Sun God delegated some of His important daily duties to lesser (but still Super) Representative gods, who were drawn from His most devout followers.

Anyone could become a Super Representative god by working hard and earning the respect (and votes) of their peers.

Sometimes that meant plowing the fields. Sometimes it meant milking the cows. But usually it meant retweeting Tesla giveaways.

These Super Representative gods were rewarded each day with a special bounty in TRX tokens, which they could use to bet on the outcome of dice games.

And although the Sun God presided over all, in His infinite wisdom He decided never to meddle in the elections of Super Representative gods.

Then one day, two of the Sun God’s followers woke to a wonderful surprise.

They had become gods themselves! For no apparent reason at all!

In the middle of the night, the Sun God appeared to have mysteriously risen from His slumber, delivering 200 million votes to Tron-Bet and 310 million votes to Tron-Ace.

And verily, the people of the Kingdom of Tron did rage, and did give vent to their anger upon Twitter, for their trust in the Sun God was sorely tested.

And so the Sun God took His sunglasses off, and in His mercy did patiently explain to the multitude.

“It’s all good,” He declared, between mouthfuls of a delicious buffet lunch.

“I know I said I would not use my powers. But I kinda needed to, and I felt like it, so I did.”

And the people were reassured, and they did rejoice, forsooth it was clear that the Sun God had their best interests at heart.

“But what about Poloniex?” asked one pugnacious inquisitor.

And the Sun God yawned as he rose over the Bay Bridge… He had an announcement of an announcement to make, and these nails weren’t going to file themselves. So He ordered the throngs to kidney-stone the interlocutor to death for their impudence.

Because He was the Sun God, and he could do whatever the heck he wanted.

Nailed It

Bloomberg Makes Crypto News

Michael Bloomberg does not live in the Kingdom of Tron but he also wants votes.

Lots of them.

National polling data from the company that bears his name has him storming to second among the Democratic nominees, bypassing former front-runner Joe Biden to sit around ten points behind Bernie Sanders with 19% of Democratic support. That’s what $7 million a day in advertising can do.

The former mayor of New York invoked the ghost of Andrew Yang this week, becoming the only remaining nominee in the race to meaningfully address cryptocurrencies and blockchain. In a Financial Reform Policy proposal, the Bloomberg campaign stated that:

“Cryptocurrencies have become an asset class worth hundreds of billions of dollars, yet regulatory oversight remains fragmented and undeveloped. For all the promise of the blockchain, Bitcoin and initial coin offerings, there’s also plenty of hype, fraud and criminal activity. Mike will work with regulators to provide clearer rules of the game.”

Like Yang, he clearly enjoys math. (He can count to over $60 billion, by some accounts.) And while Yang ran on a more liberal agenda than the former mayor, his withdrawal from the crowded Democratic field left a void.

And if there’s one thing that Mike Bloomberg loves, at least judging by his first debate performance, it’s a void. Avoiding tough questions, anyway.

Bloomberg’s debut on the primary stage was less than stellar. He took fire from the top contenders, with a re-energized Elizabeth Warren proving particularly confrontational. Bernie Sanders also took a shot at him, asking in which “tax haven” his home was based.

He may be a flawed candidate in many, many ways — and this narrative is not an endorsement of his alleged misogynistic comments in the past — but despite the debacle on the debate stage, Bloomberg has stopped and frisked the crypto narrative driven by Yang in the primaries, and adopted it as part of his own campaign.

Which is why we declare that Mike Bloomberg nailed it this week.

At least, on the subject of cryptocurrencies.

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Paul de Havilland

Paul de Havilland is a fan of disruptive technologies, and an enthusiastic investor in startups. He has covered both traditional and emerging asset classes, and also writes extensively on politics and development. His passions include violin and opera.