’Twas the weeks before Christmas on a island far away,
None could have foreseen crypto’s golden boy going astray.
When politicians and firms took FTX‘s money with glee,
Did they truly know the depth of one man’s duplicity?
Imagine if you will, the exchange’s younger days,
When business people showered the LoL player with praise.
The markets were high, adoption was booming…
How could we have seen the massive threat looming?
“Come in and talk to us,” the SEC pled,
As money flowed to agency and lawmaker instead.
For many, there would be no Merry Christmas this year,
Just a time for Krampusnacht to fill us with fear.
“Assets are fine,” said the man whose hair was unruly,
“Blame Binance — I was just doing my duty!”
“I failed! I’m sorry! It wasn’t my fault!”
“But seriously — what did you expect after a sudden withdrawal halt?”
He was dressed in a hoodie, from his fro to his waist,
All his clothes were branded with an exchange long laid waste.
A bundle of assets he had flung at his side,
Pilfered from users and investors with pride.
From a penthouse of solitude surrounded by palm trees,
He offered not Christmas gifts, but something of sleaze.
“It is your money I desire,” he said, as quick as you please,
“To hell with the holiday spirit — show me those private keys!”
“I have billions to repay! There’s not a moment to lose!”
This crypto Krampus had such a short fuse.
He failed to realize, as all hodlers know,
Crypto couldn’t be stopped with one blow.
You may tank our markets, you may regulate ad infinitum,
You may trick many with shiny tokens and huge sums,
But the promise of crypto, as with every Christmas season,
Isn’t focusing on the scams and crimes, but reason:
The reason? Crypto is here to stay.
Blockchain, and NFTs, and come what may,
You may cost us a limb, but our faith will endure.
And in the end, we will have our funds secure.